It’s hard to imagine that the last time I posted here, the coronavirus wasn’t much more than a headline in the newspaper that described sick people that were far away. That was March 3. Ten days later, the schools shut down and Henry would miss the best part of his senior year in high school. And 11 days after that, my dad died. He was gone eight days before the test came back positive. Interspersed, for reasons other than the virus, Jim and I would learn that three friends and former coworkers died untimely deaths. We’re pretty shell shocked, needless to say. Each day feels like slow motion, but goes by in the blink of an eye.
That’s why, before I get back to posting about interior design and other pretty things, I feel compelled to post pictures. Pictures that make me happy and provide some hope amidst the sadness. Thanks for your indulgence.
This is my dad.
May 23, 1941 – March 24, 2020
This is my son.
Mount Vernon Majors @ Yorktown Patriots Varsity Football (Professional photography by Arlington sports photographer Patrick R. Kane on Friday, September 20, 2019 with Canon EOS-1D X Mark II at 400mm, f / 2.8, 1/800 sec and ISO 8000)
With all this time at home, I finally took the boxed pictures from my senior year at Langley High School in McLean, VA, and compiled them into an album. Only took me 34 years to get around to it. But as I looked at those images of us–at graduation parties, getting our diplomas, going to beach week, hosting my 18th birthday party–I felt so sad that Henry’s being kept at home during what would have been his time.
BUT. Maybe he wouldn’t have set out to Shenandoah National Park with his friends (before the park shut down, that is).
And I definitely wouldn’t have had this much time to hang out with him, selfishly speaking. And he wouldn’t have been at his drafting table creating incredible pieces of art, or cutting up old clothes and sewing pieces together to make new ones. And he and his brother may not have humored us with a walk through the buttercups out in Middleburg last week:
At this point, Matt has come back into our life. Since he’d already spent time with Henry last fall (and his daughter is in Henry’s art class at Yorktown), he called me with a “big idea” one day a few weeks ago. Since the seniors were going to be missing out on so much this year, he wanted to both document their loss and celebrate their accomplishments. He set out on a mission to photograph each of the more than 500 students in Yorktown’s senior class. His project (he’s nearly halfway through at this writing) has now been covered in publications from Arlington Magazine to the Washington Post to CBS News, our local Channel 9 news, and the Today Show. Matt just posted a clip of the project on German television, which none of us can understand! He’s since gotten letters from all over the world.
I’m proud to brag that Matt came to our house to start off his project, and he shot the first three pictures of Henry, his friend Evan Rotker, and twins Sarah and Emily Roberts right in our street, maintaining a proper social distance all the while.
Evan Rotker 
Emily and Sarah Roberts
Using the same simple backdrop and shooting in black and white, Matt’s created Not Forgotton: The Yorktown Seniors of 2020. His Instagram account, linked here, shares the unique stories of each of these seniors, and they just blow me away.
Here’s our own clip of Henry’s shoot, where Matt corralled some skateboarders who just happened by at the right time:
Without this strange, sad season, I wouldn’t have ever learned about all these talented and thoughtful people with the most fascinating backgrounds and interests. They truly give us hope during a time where hope is hard to find.
Thank you, Henry. You amaze me with your resilience and equanimity. You are going to be brilliant in the honors program at Christopher Newport University. Thank you, Matt, for providing us this window into Henry’s graduating class. Thank you, of course, to Jim and Chal for the card games, family movie nights, and for grilling up some fantastic meals!
And thank you most of all, Dad, for giving me these past 50 years. I will carry your smile with me always.
Beautifully written and very touching.
Mary, thank you so very much!
Goosebumps, tears, sadness and hope. Those are the emotions as I read this. Thank you for sharing your bittersweet story and reminding us of the positive side of this very bizarre and trying time in history. This was really beautiful Jenn. Heartfelt thoughts with you and your family.
Laura I’m so touched this resonated with you — I’m sure you must be going through a lot of conflicting emotions right now too! A heartfelt congratulations on your pregnancy, and I’m very excited to meet your little one! Stay safe and healthy, my friend.
Jen, Thank you so much for sharing these beautiful thoughts and images. I know you are suffering a terrible loss but you’ve found a way to focus on and celebrate all the goodness and joy you’ve received in your time with your dad and in all your family relationships. Thank you, Joe.
Joe, thank you! It’s all we can do, right?
Loved this post so much Jennifer! Loss of a father is mightily different than a mother. To me when I was 27, that loss was like the central pole holding up the family tent. He was not there to see my second child, nor walk my two sisters down the aisle, nor see their children.
Glad to see Henry made a difference with this stay at home order! What a fun project to put forth. Loved all the photos you showed of your family moments. We keep this close, and this is why it’s so important for the senior members of our families to get their stories written down or video recorded.
As a side note, I graduated from Langlet in 1982. Small world!
Heather thank you so much for these kind words! It actually never occurred to me that my dad would miss my son’s high school graduation, and now neither is happening. But I get through every day by focusing on gratitude for what I have, for what my family has, and the good fortune we have to be healthy and together. I would say “Go Saxons” to you, but since Yorktown plays them in football, I’ve become a Patriots fan!
This is so heart warming. What a thoughtful and talented young man! He looks a lot like his granddad. Sorry for your loss Jennifer.
Federica
Thank you Federica! Henry is the spitting image of my dad from when he was a teenager. It’s eery when you hold up those pictures next to each other! At least a good part of my dad lives on in my son, and that makes me so happy 🙂
Thank you for sharing this with us Jen-I am so very sorry for your loss. Please be well and stay safe.
Hello friend! I so appreciate your kind words, thank you.
But….these are pretty things. All of these photos and your words are truly beautiful! I’m SO sorry about your father. It’s so difficult to lose a parent, but especially during these times when you can’t be with family to mourn. I hope you can find comfort in your fond memories. Your son is a spitting image of your father and his spirit will live on in him. Sending you peace, love, and light.
Oh gosh Sarah thank you! I tend not to share personal things, but you are right. Our families are the prettiest thing in our lives and it lifts me up to be able to celebrate them. Be well, and thank you so much for writing in!
I’m so sorry to hear about your losses, Jennifer. Thank you for sharing your sentiments, photos and your uplifting message. You have a beautiful family and I wish you the best.
Back at you Lori, and I hope to see you again in High Point when this is all over! Truly appreciate your kind wishes.
Really sweet tribute to all. Miss you! Post COVID-19 cocktails are in our future. Stay safe enjoy the extra time with Henry before he heads off. The first college farewell was tough, but it gets better.
Thank you Diane, miss you too. Can’t wait to hold one of your fleur-de-lys glasses again!
Jennifer what a heartbreaking and beautiful tribute. Your dad will live on in your hearts forever and in his handsome lookalike grandson. May his memory be for a blessing.
His memory is definitely a blessing! And you are right, he lives on in my son — they do look so much alike. Thank you, Barbara!
A beautiful tribute to your dad and Henry! I’m so grateful to you for sharing the photos and telling your story. Hugs to you my friend – look forward to the next time we see each other!
Me too, thank you Rebecca!
Lovely. Such a warm tribute to your family. We are all loving following Matt’s work too!
Thanks Lisa — love and hugs to you and Jeff, xoxo
Thank you for sharing Jenifer. There is so much love to celebrate. During these times it is nice to be reminded of that love and family.
You are right Sheryl. I made a list of good things and bad things out of this pandemic, and the “good” list was twice as long. Always good to keep perspective 🙂
Jen. First so very sorry to hear about your dad. You wrote so beautifully about him and how wonderful you got that trip to Germany with him. I’m so very sad for you. Sincerest condolences
And much like all the comments above your son is so handsome and I never even knew he played football so this is just so nice for you to share a personal side of you to us. How fantastic Matt Mendelsohn did the photo shoot. What a wonderful gift to all those kids.
His future looks bright and so Haley you have that to look forward to.
Again very sad for your loss. Take special care.
Charlene
Charlene thank you so much for the kind words! There are so many gifts around us right now. Not that they offset the loss, but I guess they make it a bit more bearable. Love to you all!
Thank you!
As I read your words and viewed the beautiful photographs I was reminded how none of us escape life without sorrow, but we can choose the joys of our journey to get us through!
My life is so much richer because you’ve shared, so beautifully and eloquently, your journey with your loved ones and your choice to focus on the joys!
Virtual hugs your way!!!! ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you, dear friend! Your missives during this shutdown always put a smile on my face, and I feel lucky to be held up by such an incredibly caring community, especially because you are in it. Be well, Wayne — sending love your way!
So very sorry to hear about your lost. Let your sons be your new guiding light at this difficult time.
Nestor
My sons and husband are a constant guiding light, thank you Nestor! I’m lucky to be surrounded by strong, wonderful resilient young men 🙂
Jen, despite your protestations, you did, in fact, post about very “pretty things” in this piece — beautiful, rich, textured, sparkling, stunning memories. Thank you for that gift. Sending my love to all of you.
Oh gosh thank you Laurie Ann. You are right of course — my family is my ultimate “pretty thing” – can’t wait to see you all when this is over!
What a beautiful testament to your family. So sorry about your dad, I can tell he was loved. Hugs.
Thank you Brian, for reading and responding — that means so much. I hope you are well and healthy!
Jennifer, I don’t know your family but it is clear from your writing that there is great warmth here. I am sorry that you lost your Dad who must have been so special. Your son is so handsome and seems like a real gentleman.
Please well and know that many people care about you.
Wendy
Much appreciated Wendy! The best thing is that Henry looks just like my dad when he was that age 🙂
Such a beautiful tribute to your family…. definitely a silver lining in this surreal time.
Jean, so nice to hear from you — thank you!
Brillant Jennifer – Your deeply personal insights on love, loss and creativity in such difficult times is a welcome read. It makes me feel fortunate to have my health, my family and dear friends because that matters most. This too shall pass, and in the meantime go Henry and Matt!
You’re so kind Melissa — definitely, cherish every single moment with your family. For me, waking up each morning and taking a deep breath and feeling healthy is such a gift, never to be taken for granted!
Beautiful Jen! Your writing is your gift back to us. Touching our hearts, we feel family, love and beauty
If only I could give you a big fat hug right now, Debbie!
What a wonderful photo tribute of your father.I miss him a lot and will miss seeing him when this isolation is over. We had a wonderful love and friendship as cousins and he will always be a part of my life. He loved you two girls more than anything. Love, Cousin Sylv
Thank you Sylvia! I am so grateful to you for staying in such close touch with Dad, and faithfully coming to pick him up and take him to those lunches in Potomac — it was the highlight of each month! Please let’s stay in touch, I know Dad would have wanted that, xoxo
Wow. Just … wow. What a lovely, heartfelt, moving, and “real” post.
Thank you Leslie Ann, I miss you and the St. Mary’s family!
Jen – I’m crying again! Love this piece, and love you. And of course Henry, Chalmers and Dad. Xx
Thanks Kath, I know! Love you back xx
What a year you’ve had full of all the feels! I’m so sorry for the loss of your Dad and on top of it the loss of milestone moments with Henry. You are so right that this incredibly trying time in our history gives us the time to reflect on the pieces of gold that shine through. Thank you for documenting your year and for sharing this beautiful story.
xoxo
Annie
Annie you’re the best, thank you!
You brought me to tears, Jennifer. Lovely tribute to your dad. And how fortunate to have such stunningly beautiful images of your handsome son!
I have a senior who missed out on all her well-deserved pomp and circumstance also. She was completing her student teaching when North Carolina closed all public schools. She never had a chance to tell the kids goodbye. She danced for four years in the UNC-Wilmington dance company, but they were unable to perform their senior dances. They rehearsed one week, and campus was shut down the next. She cried the night she would have danced on stage for the last time with them. But, my goodness, they are going to be a resilient bunch! I know your son will excel! Wishing you and your family well!
Pat, misery loves company! I’m so sorry for your daughter. Hard sad lessons for sure. But I know this will teach them to cherish each and every single moment because the next one is not guaranteed. Best of luck to your smart, talented daughter. Let’s hope college starts on time!
Wow Jennifer. I’m in tears. Your dad was amazing and your son is amazing. Perfect to read as I sit next to my daughter.
Thank you Paula! Trying slowly to emerge back into things. Just soaking up time with family though, and hoping the rest of us pass through this intact
What a perfect portrait of the times. I’m so sorry for your loss and sending biggest hugs.
As we all navigate these strange times, thank you for such a lovely insight into your world. Much love.
Thank you Kati, and back at you — thinking of all my friends and missing everyone!
So beautiful, Jenn…Very moving! Very on point, documenting these strange times.
It also got me interested in the photography of Matt Mendelsohn. . What a great photographer indeed.
Best always,
Julie
Thanks Julie, isn’t Matt great?? Hoping for another safe-distance happy hour soon!
Such a touching, rich, lovely post. Thank you for sharing. My best to your family, and cheers to Henry!